A guy walks into the lobby of my building, walks past four working elevators, and starts pressing the call button of the fifth elevator, which is obviously not in service.
Security Guard: What are you doing? Don't do that.
Guy: Is this elevator broken?
SG: It's off today.
Guy: But I can't walk up fourteen flights of stairs!
SG: You can use another elevator.
SG: There. Or there, there, and there.
You can't make this stuff up.